what if we always ran?

When I was walking on campus the other day I saw this guy in a tie just sprinting somewhere. I've always wondered how our society would function if we all just ran everywhere we went. Everyone would start as babies just learning to run and we wouldn't really walk much, unless carrying large things like pianos or in the case of a serious injury. We would all be healthier and get more things done because we would save time by running everywhere. We would all have great stamina to run incredibly far, way more than we think is possible. That's my idea. Who's with me?

the history of your mom

Awhile ago at work some of my friends were telling their favorite "your mom" lines. Recently I was listening to a book called Collapse and it talks about all these different nations and what happened to them. One of these nations hundreds of years ago had your mom lines too. Who knew it went back so far? It was during a time where people were starving and cannibalism was starting for people trying to survive. So this book said the worst insult you could say to someone at that time was "the flesh of your mother sticks between my teeth." I would say that's pretty harsh.

I am dead

I recently discovered that I am dead because I have no blood pressure. I think that is a requirement for a live body, which I am not. I was with Brandon by one of those blood pressure machines and he sat down and got his blood pressure. So I sat down to get mine and it gave me an error message and said my blood pressure was 9. So I tried again and it did the same thing, then Brandon tried again, it worked fine, then I tried again and got another 9. I gave up. A week or two later I was by the machine again and tried two more times. Still no blood pressure. I'm just not really alive.